However,
none of my comparisons could change the fact that I was out of control.
The simple truth was that I was deceiving my husband each time I pulled out the
credit card without his knowledge, and I did it more often than I cared to
admit. My perpetual over-spending and insistence on handling the money my way
defied both God and my husband and eventually brought me to a place where I
couldn't imagine living without credit.
Thankfully, God has since dethroned that idol. It was a war waged over a period of years, but the first battle was destroying the mindset that allowed me to marginalize my own misbehavior by deeming it not as bad as someone else's. Anytime we excuse our behavior on the grounds that we are relatively good, we are engaging in a feeble attempt to establish our own righteousness, and my tendency to do so isn't isolated to my struggle with debt.
It's
unfortunate because when we focus on the shortcomings of others rather
than our own transgressions, our sins remain unconfessed, and our hearts remain
unchanged. When we convince ourselves that we're "not so bad," we
deny ourselves the restorative power of the cross and hold ourselves back from
becoming all that God has called us to be.
Have you
ever soothed your conscience by telling yourself you are relatively good?
"If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just and will
forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness." - 1 John 1:9
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